Youth Rehabilitation Center Announces Exciting New Therapy Program: “Solitary Confinement with a Side of...
KANAB, UT—In a groundbreaking move to revolutionize mental health care, the local youth rehabilitation facility RCR has announced its innovative new therapy program: “Solitary...
Kanab’s Mock Manhunt Confuses Tourists, Delights Deputies, Traumatizes One Retired Snowbird from Omaha
Sheriff’s Department Assures Public: “We Have No Idea Why We Did That Either”KANAB, UT — Sirens blared, radios crackled, and teenage boys sprinted through...
Patriots in Kanab Furious After Discovering Other Kanab Patriots Also Patriotic, But Wrong
KANAB, UT — Patriots of Kanab rallied last Sunday to express patriotism, anger, and a general sense that something is very wrong with the...
In Surprise Move Kane County Voters Choose To Write-In “No One” and “Anyone Else”
In a surprise bid to express their growing displeasure with Local Government, Kane County voters staged an unplanned, yet surprisingly widespread write-in campaign in...
FIREFIGHTER LAWSUIT IGNITES RACIAL DEBATE IN KANE COUNTY, WHERE DIVERSITY MEANS OWNING TWO DOGS
KANE COUNTY, UT—In a plot twist that surprised absolutely no one familiar with Southern Utah, Corey Turner, a Black firefighter, has filed a lawsuit...
Liberal Protest in Kanab Uses Facts, Empathy to Confuse Locals Who Thought the Last...
KANAB, UT — Nearly 200 protestors marched through downtown Kanab Saturday as part of the “Hands Off” March, a local outpouring of progressive frustration,...
Local “Dog Park” Revealed to Be Minimalist Art Installation on Deforestation, Confused Pets Left...
KANAB, UT — What was once believed to be the town’s most aggressively featureless dog park has now been revealed as a high-concept minimalist...
State of Emergency Hits Fredonia as Town Swaps Ambulances for “Granbulances”
FREDONIA, AZ — In a shocking turn of events that literally nobody predicted (except everyone who’s ever dealt with state-level bureaucracy), the Town of...
Former Town Manager Arrested for Attempting to Hack Kanab City Computer, Probably Just Looking...
KANAB, UT — Joe Decker, the Hurricane Valley Fire Chief and former city manager of Kanab, was arrested late last week after allegedly breaching...
Developer Proudly Unveils “Sheriff’s Estates,” Kanab’s Most Secure Subdivision, Whether You Like It or...
KANAB, UT—In a bold move that has left locals scratching their heads and laughing nervously, an out-of-town developer has announced the construction of Sheriff’s...
