Developer Proudly Unveils “Sheriff’s Estates,” Kanab’s Most Secure Subdivision, Whether You Like It or...
KANAB, UT—In a bold move that has left locals scratching their heads and laughing nervously, an out-of-town developer has announced the construction of Sheriff’s...
Youth Rehabilitation Center Announces Exciting New Therapy Program: “Solitary Confinement with a Side of...
KANAB, UT—In a groundbreaking move to revolutionize mental health care, the local youth rehabilitation facility RCR has announced its innovative new therapy program: “Solitary...
Kane County Mafia Teams Up With Pickleball Mafia and Facebook Admins to Hunt Down...
KANAB, UT—Local humorist and certified menace to society, L.G. Johnson, is once again facing public backlash for daring to poke fun at the town’s...
FIREFIGHTER LAWSUIT IGNITES RACIAL DEBATE IN KANE COUNTY, WHERE DIVERSITY MEANS OWNING TWO DOGS
KANE COUNTY, UT—In a plot twist that surprised absolutely no one familiar with Southern Utah, Corey Turner, a Black firefighter, has filed a lawsuit...
Blinded by the Light: Police Chief Claims Sun as Key Suspect in Auto-Pedestrian Crash
KANAB, UT— In a shocking development that's sure to renew public trust in law enforcement, Kanab Police Chief Tom Cram demonstrated the department’s unwavering...
Local Woman Defends Petroglyph Vandalism as “Interactive Art Project,” Cites Over 17 Reasons for...
KANAB, UT—In what experts are calling “an unmatched display of excuse-based creativity,” Daniela Ganassim Ericksen, the suspect arrested for vandalizing petroglyphs at the Wire...
Councilman Changes Position and Declares Newcomers Delivering Food as ”Locals”
In a stark turn of events, prominent Kanab City Council members officially declared all recent transplants as "locals" and said they would now prefer...
Local “Dog Park” Revealed to Be Minimalist Art Installation on Deforestation, Confused Pets Left...
KANAB, UT — What was once believed to be the town’s most aggressively featureless dog park has now been revealed as a high-concept minimalist...
Kanab to Get “Round”-the-Clock Safety with New Roundabout Plans
KANAB, UT—The Kanab City Council spun into action this week, tackling everything from heartfelt farewells to a potential new roundabout at the notorious 89A...
Kane County Votes to Secede from Utah, Citing ‘Excessive Listening to Citizens’
Secret Meeting Totally Normal and Not at All Illegal, Say Officials While Shoving Agenda Under Couch Cushions
KANAB, UT — In a move that legal...












